This is a picture of Greg Lansky, Amia Miley and Kendra Sunderland

TWO-TIME AVN DIRECTOR OF THE YEAR ONCE AGAIN CHOOSES QUALITY!

As our sweat shorts can attest, quality may not be our thing but that doesn’t mean we don’t recognize it when we see it.

In a quality profile piece published earlier today on AVN.com, two-time AVN Director of the Year Greg Lansky, a representative of quality, appeared in a subtle little Versace number that reminded us how stubbornly fluid heterosexuality can be.

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This is a picture of the largest penis ever!

ENORMOUS PENIS SKEWS BELL CURVE PISSING OFF LEGIONS OF SELF-CONSCIOUS MEN…LIKE US!

As you might assume from the writing on this blog, we here at POPPORN are very short on confidence. As balding, tubby men who are uglier than Ernest Borgnine we’re essentially on the verge of suicide at all times. In fact, the only thing we have going for us (the one thing that keeps us from the brink of collapse) are our beautiful penises. Seriously, ask anyone. Our dicks are impressive.

Studies report that the average erect penis length is 5.5 inches. The average POPPORN staff member penis size is 5.8 inches in length making us 5% larger than the average. 5% larger than you, fuckers. We’re huge!

Or, at least we thought so until this asshole came along!

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