Popular, prolific, punk-dressing, punk-hair-having, porno princess JOANNA ANGEL and this dude named SMALLS HAND are releasing their own brand of whiskey for all you porn lovers who are so filled with shame from whacking off that you need to get big time loaded all the fuckin’ time!
The whiskey is called DOOM’S… which kind of seems weird since it isn’t Dr. Doom’s whiskey at all – it’s Joanna Angel’s and Smalls Hand’s. But hey, they’re the rich people and I’m not so WHO THE HELL AM I TO ARGUE?
If you haven’t checked out the current pornographic trends over the past few years, you may be surprised to find out that the idea of screwing people in your family is among the most popular trends out there at the moment! Which is weird, because in real life, we’re pretty sure that most “family-style” relationships result in lots of emotional trauma, years of depression or worse! Fun fact!
But, y’know, what with porn being an all-encompassing “fantasy world” where the normal rules don’t apply and all that jazz…
Please enjoy this exclusive photo gallery from Digital Sin’s upcoming film, I Want My Sister 3!
Brian Sloan, creator of the crowdfunded suckjob automaton known as the Autoblow, is back for more. And it ain’t just suckjobs this time!
In an effort to further the dream of coitus without connections, Mr. Sloan has returned to the public sphere with a brand new sex monstrosity called the “3fap”. Like the autoblow, it’s basically a series of beads that gently (or, actually, pretty vigorously) massage your cock until you jit inside of it, and then have to clean it out (which is an extra thrill for jizz enthusiasts, because it REALLY gets in there)! What makes the 3fap different is the fact that rather than being adorned with only a weird looking pair of small-enough-that-they-seem-really-creepy lips, this one’s got THREE unique sex holes for you to pork your load into!
Hey guys! Tori Black‘s apparently coming back to porn! And it doesn’t sound like this return is just a solo scene like last time she “returned to porn” for some piece of shit parody by a bunch of idiots who thought they were funny!
We count ourselves among the highest caliber of double-penetration enthusiasts. Seeing dicks go in both holes is a zesty and enthralling exercise that we’re happy to witness whenever fate allows it. We like doublefucking a whole lot. Which is the only reason we here at POPPORN feel qualified to pass judgement on the recent blockbuster epic DP Masters 4.
A simple question: Are you still able to whack off to a simple photograph?
In this ever-changing digital age of instant gratification, unchecked gapery and mind-blowing fist videos, we here at POPPORN are forced to wonder: who among you still has the mental fortitude to look at a simple sexually-themed photograph and use it to coax your jit out of your wang?Have you still got it in you to whack off to a simple photograph?
“Hey stupid! Turn of that Skrillex or whatever the fuck you’re listening to, because porn stars are making tunes for you!
Sure, you’re used to having pornographers assault your eyes – what with all the cunts and dicks and jit and spit and gapes and whatnot – but did you know that they can also assault your ears?! It’s true! Today we’ll take a look at two much-beloved porn personalities, both of whom are established musicians in their own right. They’ll get one tune each to prove themselves and the onus will be on you – the supergenius whose life choices somehow led them here to POPPORN (nice going, IDIOT) – to cast judgment and decide…WHO GOT THE BETTER TUNES?!