THIS WEEKEND’S VOD FAVES!

Hey! The weekend is here, and while many would use that to take in a show, go camping or maybe even work on a home improvement project, we know better than that. The weekend is, to anyone who knows a thing or two about enjoying life, a time to whack off as much as possible to as many things as possible!

With that in mind, our stellar VOD service happens to have a few suggestions for you! Read on to see POPPORN’s top5 VOD picks, but we’ll warn you…it might get a little bit disgusting!

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This is a picture of a woman eating semen

THIS WEEKEND’S VOD FAVES!

With the launch of the brand-new POPPORN.com this summer, our On Demand experience was upgraded and improved dramatically. Our library of films that are available to watch instantly is MASSIVE and full of all sorts of sexy, sultry, deviant and downright filthy porno flicks. Just take a peek at the current top 5 bestsellers listed below. The kinds of sexual acts portrayed therein would have lead to mass executions in the 1800’s. But now? Now these delightful sexual adventures are ALL available to watch INSTANTLY!

Please note, these aren’t OUR top 5 because we’re WAY more morally bankrupt – but maybe you snowflakes will enjoy these!

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POPPORN #478 COVER

OUR NEW CATALOG IS COMING SOON AND THE COVER IS SO BONKERS GOOD THAT WE’RE ALREADY CUMMING JUST BY LOOKING AT IT!

Did you know that in addition to be a Pulitzer-Prize Winning Blog, we also sell DVDs and sex toys and all kindsa great stuff like that?

It’s true! And not to tweeze our own big-time wangs, but we tend to offer better deals than pretty much anyone else in the world in the mega-sized, horribly pornographic catalogs we produce several time each year. It’s 56 pages long, full color and completely fucking packed with tons of hardcore, uncensored imagery. You can totally whack off to it, even before your DVD order arrives!


Why are we telling you all this? Well, frankly, it’s just because our art department just delivered the front cover for the upcoming catalog and it looks so bonkers good that we’re about ready to start blowing jit out of our eyeballs just by thinking of it.

Click through to see the full cover!

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Lubed Ass - WHY NOT?!

BUTTFUCKING IS COOL AND ALL BUT THIS MARKETING CAMPAIGN MAKES NO SENSE!

Someone might need to sit down with Wicked Sensual Care’s head of marketing and have a little talk.

WICKED JELLE ANAL LUBE

It’s like we don’t like anal sex, and it’s not like we don’t like lube, and it’s certainly not like we have any problem with anything black (although our editor-in-chief does listen to a lot of Alex Jones and one of our writers has the same haircut as Richard Spencer), but guys…

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IN SHOCKING NEWS, REMOVING YOUR CONDOM MID-COITUS MAY PUT YOU IN LEGAL JEOPARDY!!

This post serves as a public service announcement to the male members of our audience.

Gentlemen, while some of you may believe it’s your God-given right to be total and unadulterated douche-bags, none of you should believe that it’s acceptable behavior to take your condom off while having sex with someone without that person’s consent.

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