POPPORN HAS NO CATHOLICS ON STAFF, SO WE’RE NOT AT ALL CONFLICTED ABOUT CUMMING TO ‘CONFESSIONS OF A SINFUL NUN’!

Sweetheart Video has a new movie called Confessions of a Sinful Nun that many would consider to be somewhat deviant and sacreligious, but Brian Bangs makes all POPPORN staffers sign a bunch of affidavits and shit where we have to legally renounce all religions before we’re allowed to collect any paychecks. Granted, we haven’t yet gotten paid for doing any “work” here, but if the day ever comes that we make a dollar or a cent in this business, we certainly don’t want any stupid “faith” to get in the way of cashing those bucks, right?

Anyway, the point is, with this being a religion-free zone, we’re freed from certain constraints placed on lots of people in “normal” society. Specifically, we can whack off to movies about sexy nuns like Sweetheart Video’s new Christian pussy bonanza and not feel even the slightest bit bad about it. After all, it’s not like heaven exists, and if it did we most likely wouldn’t be allowed in.

If you’re like us, you just MIGHT enjoy whacking off to all these pictures from the movie!

Confessions of a Sinful Nun
Lots more after the jump!

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POPPORN #478 COVER

OUR NEW CATALOG IS COMING SOON AND THE COVER IS SO BONKERS GOOD THAT WE’RE ALREADY CUMMING JUST BY LOOKING AT IT!

Did you know that in addition to be a Pulitzer-Prize Winning Blog, we also sell DVDs and sex toys and all kindsa great stuff like that?

It’s true! And not to tweeze our own big-time wangs, but we tend to offer better deals than pretty much anyone else in the world in the mega-sized, horribly pornographic catalogs we produce several time each year. It’s 56 pages long, full color and completely fucking packed with tons of hardcore, uncensored imagery. You can totally whack off to it, even before your DVD order arrives!


Why are we telling you all this? Well, frankly, it’s just because our art department just delivered the front cover for the upcoming catalog and it looks so bonkers good that we’re about ready to start blowing jit out of our eyeballs just by thinking of it.

Click through to see the full cover!

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Lubed Ass - WHY NOT?!

BUTTFUCKING IS COOL AND ALL BUT THIS MARKETING CAMPAIGN MAKES NO SENSE!

Someone might need to sit down with Wicked Sensual Care’s head of marketing and have a little talk.

WICKED JELLE ANAL LUBE

It’s like we don’t like anal sex, and it’s not like we don’t like lube, and it’s certainly not like we have any problem with anything black (although our editor-in-chief does listen to a lot of Alex Jones and one of our writers has the same haircut as Richard Spencer), but guys…

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HOLY ZOOB, CHECK OUT SIRI'S JUGGS!

A TWITTER USER INSPIRED US TO CHECK OUT THESE THINGS CALLED “TITS” AND HERE ARE THE RESULTS!

While stumbling through the internet in search of leftist propaganda and pictures of cunts, we happened upon this twitter account early today:

Naturally, we were perplexed and wanted to know more. Who was “fred0ra” and why is he so enamored with tits, or what laymen refer to as “titties”? Naturally, we felt the need to dig further, and thus began a four-hour inquiry into the sickest juggs in existence, the results of which we’re pleased to present here for your enjoyment (and so you can jit)

So, obviously, lots of GIF of tits after the jump!

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Angela Loves Anal

WHEN ANGELA WHITE ASSFUCKS – YOU PAY ATTENTION!

Angela White, owner of the world’s sickest tits, is droppin’ a new flick on your sorry asses and – whaddaya know – it’s chock full of assfuckin’!

Yup, Angela Loves Anal is on it’s way, and it’s gonna redefine the way you think about gorgeous women getting porked in the bunghole! We’re talking double penetrations, two dicks in the asshole and even double stuffed cunts! We’ve been big fans of pretty much everything Angela’s done since AGW Entertainment launched, but this one’s totally gonna outdo anything we’ve seen before.

But don’t take our word for it, just watch the trailer, stupid!

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Y’ALL LIKE TITTIES, DON’T YOU?

We’re gonna go out on a limb and suggest that if you’re here reading our award-winning blog, you just possibly might enjoy looking at tits every now and then. With that in mind, it seemed like it might be a good idea to let you know about a new POPPORN EXCLUSIVE that we put together with the help of our good friend, legendary pornographer B.Skow!

We’re proud to present Big Boob Sex, a 2-disc examination of juggs getting fucked out BIG TIME! You’re gonna fuckin’ love it, doods!

Tons of photos from this big whammin’ celebration of titties after the jump!

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Lana Rhoades in HardX's GANGBANG ME 4

SURE, WE’LL WATCH LANA RHOADES GET GANGBANGED!

We’re willing to admit that we’ve got a slightly unhealthy obsession with Lana Rhoades. But also, she’s stunning as fuck and we really enjoy watching her perform sex acts, so who gives two shits?

Anyway, our friends at HardX were kind enough to pass on this sneak peek of Lana’s very first Gangbang, and we thought you may just possibly like to take a look! And if you don’t…well then, you must be some kinda big-time dipshit or somethin!

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TAKERS

NEW WICKED FEATURE TO SETTLE HEALTHCARE DEBATE ONCE AND FOR ALL!

GUYS, 2017’s AVN AWARD WINNER IS COMING!

Brad Armstrong, best known for his raging Canadian boner and socially-aware erotica, is back with a brand new, totally “woke” movie that’s aimed squarely at whoever chooses the AVN winners (which we’re pretty sure is this guy).

Set in the not-too-distant future, Takers tackles the political hot potato of healthcare, a topic we’d say is “wicked” relevant this week (get it? Wicked?), by imagining a world where rising costs have made black market surgical procedures the norm and patients are forced to do all kinds of crazy shit (mostly blowing dudes and stuff) to secure the care they need.
Asa Akira in TAKERS

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Lana Rhoades in STACKED 5

IT’S A LANA RHOADES GIF PARTY!

Like the lazy, misanthropic, orange beast of legend (Garfield, not Trump), we here at POPPORN do NOT appreciate Mondays. We’re still deeply rooted in our sweet-ass weekend vibes, partially still drunk and frankly, just plain against the idea of returning to the workweek.

But this is life, and we all gotta go back to work sometime. So if we can’t summon the power to cancel all Monday workdays, we can at least improve them slightly, by compiling GIFs of 2017’s breakout superstar Lana Rhoades doing awesome shit with her stunning body and chucking them back at you, the chronically-horny public.

ENJOY!

Lana Rhoades in Young & Beautiful 4

Many more after the jump (including assfuckin’)!

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