Anyone who’s seen Spock BUCKTON in action should not be surprised to find that most women refuse to be in the same room with him. So, while we were lucky enough to score an interview with porn superstar Kimmy Granger, we were forced, once again, to conduct the interview from a minimum of 300 miles away, via satellite from our Pittsburgh offices.
A full US State’s distance between interviewer and interviewee was actually one of the conditions listed in the agreement Kimmy asked us to sign. Sigh…we’ll take it.
Hey! The weekend is here, and while many would use that to take in a show, go camping or maybe even work on a home improvement project, we know better than that. The weekend is, to anyone who knows a thing or two about enjoying life, a time to whack off as much as possible to as many things as possible!
With that in mind, our stellar VOD service happens to have a few suggestions for you! Read on to see POPPORN’s top5 VOD picks, but we’ll warn you…it might get a little bit disgusting!
In an unprecedented move that is sure to send shockwaves throughout the music industry, sex toy juggernaut DOC JOHNSON is apparently launching some kind of traveling music tour involving a vending machine that shoots dildos or some shit at the crowd. Details are sparse at the moment, but we can only imagine that this will reinvent the music industry as we know it.
A lot of people think it’s easy to be as wise and revered as we here at POPPORN are, but they’d be wrong. Sitting in judgment of all of God’s creations can be a tricky business, but someone has to do it, and if not us, who? Neil fucking Gorsuch? That guy can’t judge his way out of a dickhole competition!
(Wait, don’t leave yet! There’s pussy photos later in the article!)
Look, I don’t got a lota dough so I don’t buy my lunch often. But when I do, I’m usually looking for a delicious, steaming bowl of soup. The dictionary defines “soup” as a liquid dish, typically made by boiling meat, fish, or vegetable, etc., in stock or water but I just define it as liquid gold.
Today, I picked out a scrumptious white bean chili but GODDAMN THAT SOUP WAS HOT!
UPDATE: The Lana Rhoades tweet seen later in this story is actually from the day BEFORE the incident, a fact we were hipped to by Adriana Chechik via twitter. While we would NEVER attempt to be actual journalists or present any manner of integrity in our writing, we figured we ought to clear the air and correct ourselves. We’re dummies. It’s kinda our thing. Sorry!
Word on the street is that Lana Rhoades and Adriana Chechik beefed BIG TIME during this weekend’s night moves awards! We weren’t there, and we don’t really believe in asking “sources” so we really don’t have any goddamn idea what sparked the incident, but suffice it to say, it sounds like SHIT WAS FUCKED UP. And as a result, Ms. Rhoades has been dropped from LA Models! Whuh-oh!
With the launch of the brand-new POPPORN.com this summer, our On Demand experience was upgraded and improved dramatically. Our library of films that are available to watch instantly is MASSIVE and full of all sorts of sexy, sultry, deviant and downright filthy porno flicks. Just take a peek at the current top 5 bestsellers listed below. The kinds of sexual acts portrayed therein would have lead to mass executions in the 1800’s. But now? Now these delightful sexual adventures are ALL available to watch INSTANTLY!
Please note, these aren’t OUR top 5 because we’re WAY more morally bankrupt – but maybe you snowflakes will enjoy these!
We’re used to seeing adult performers shill this or that on twitter. It sort of comes with the gig. You shoot your movies and whatnot, but then you plug the retail sites that sell them, the studios that release them, the clubs you dance at, the cam sites that fake shark bites to gain traction in this ever-more-challenging world.